Once Upon a Time: there was a lovely YOUNG princess who lived in an enchanted land where clutter was a big NO NO. Sadly, a horrible curse was bestowed upon her (i think it's called love or something...seriously, watch out for this spell 'cause it can really mess a girl up something fierce) and married King Pack Rat of Keepingeverthingville.
Many years later, the princess (ok now queen and there is a new princess who lives in the upstairs land called Nevergoingtocleanitupville) suddenly realized they had waaaaaaay too much crap and it was time to have a magical yardsale! Of course at this point, that curse from long ago had totally worn off and it was replaced with "eh, I could do worse" so she commanded King Pack Rat to "get thee to thy attic and purge like your life depended on it or your living with your mother" aka dragon baroness von stinky pants doody head (tee hee)
The treasures King Pack Rat Found! Baseball cards! Lionel Train Sets! Photos! It was like Christmas and birthdays all rolled into one! Oh but the best was the 1976 Mcdonald drinking glasses and the Burger Chef Shazzam and Superman glasses just coated with lead paint! OH JOY WHATEVER SHALL WE DO WITH THEM????
And the princess decread: 7 days from now we shall haveth the biggest damn yard sale known to these parts! We shall sell all this stuff and makith a large profit, and there was much rejoycing in the land.